- Martha Engeman
Busy Body Time-Out
I come from a family of doers. I bet that most of you do too. A good day tends to be measured in accomplishments and checks on the “to do” list. While I have practiced meditation for years, that still hasn’t quelled my compulsion to get things done. So in this time of quarantine, my list has changed to shifting my energy healing business online and to all those home projects that need to be done. With the advent of spring, that includes planting the garden, yard clean up, lots of weeding and mulching—you get the gist.
Yet when I step back, I think that one of the lessons of this quarantine period is to stop and take time to be with ourselves and our lives in a whole new way. There is a dynamic tension between the compulsion to get things done and the desire to stop and be.
I suppose then, that it is no accident that I ended up with a mild sprain in my right ankle derived from some of the aforementioned weeding. It literally forced me to lie down, put my leg up and rest. It is my body’s way of saying, “You aren’t completely getting the message of this time, so we will find a way to show you.” The physical discomfort in my ankle mirrors my inner discomfort over not being able to accomplish as much. If I define myself by what I do, than who am I if I can’t do as much? I am being called to develop more love and compassion for my self.
At this time, we are invited to look at what is working and what isn’t in our lives. We are invited to examine and question some of the beliefs that drive us and our society. We are invited into a new relationship with ourselves, our loved ones, our communities and our earth home.
As a species, we have almost fully explored our outer world. Now the call is to go in. That is not always an easy call to follow. It requires us to come face to face with the parts of us that we love and the parts that are really challenging. It forces us to see and feel fear and uncertainty. It forces us to give up the ground we know for a new, and as yet completely unknown ground. Notice how you are experiencing this time. Is it bringing up fears and uncertainties? Are you enjoying having more time and space? How are your relationships? Chances are, many of us are experiencing the gamut of emotions. Can we be gentle with ourselves in this process? Can we have faith that this too shall pass?
As for my ankle, I know it will heal. I am blessed with good health in a time when many are fighting for their lives, and I am grateful. As for the compulsion to get things done? That, my friends, is a work in progress.